family pic

family pic

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Emotional Rollercoaster...

Whew, I can't believe it's been over a year since I last posted!!! Anyway I figured the easiest and quickest way to tell my story was to blog about it. So here goes:
Back in September when I was supposed to start my monthly cycle I was crampy and spotty for about a week. I thought oh my cycle is messed up or I got pregnant and it's a dud. (Don't mind my gallows humor, but when you've gone through what I have you kind of detach yourself) Time went on and we went to the beach in October with Travis and Sonja's family. While there I wasn't feeling the best so thought "hmmm... maybe I am pg" Then one night I all of a sudden started bleeding and was in severe pain with it. I thought oh boy it's a miscarriage. The bleeding slowed to practically nothing the next day and I was still feeling weird. About a week later I did the same thing, but without the pain. Severe bleeding and then nothing. I had a flight out to NH to be with my sister when she had her twin boys and I was nervous about flying alone with a 14 month old with strange things going on with my body. At this time I was still feeling gross so decided to take a pregnancy test. Mind you, I hadn't taken one since my 4th miscarriage. With an upcoming flight and not knowing what was going on I decided on the test. Took it and it showed positive. This was a Sunday and my flight was for the following Saturday. Monday morning I called the doctor and they got me in that afternoon. I did the bloodwork etc. and they got all my information. I was able to get an ultrasound that afternoon and saw a tiny beating heart. I was 7 weeks and 3 days.. My heart was happy and I went on home. Then that evening just before bedtime I get a call from my doctor. He said there was blood around baby and it looked like I would miscarry. I was slammed with emotions from sorrow to rage and cried many tears.
The doctor wanted me to come back for another ultrasound Thursday and if baby had indeed died do a D&C and possibly still be able to fly out on Saturday. Thursday came and I showed up for the ultrasound not expecting any good news, but was surprised when the ultrasound tech said the heart rate is 163! Wait, what?! It's still alive?! So into the doctor's office I go. He told me the blood was still there and to get another ultrasound in two weeks to see what was happening. Then if all went well another one in a month. At his advice I cancelled my trip as it would be very scary and dangerous to start hemorrhaging in flight or something like that!
Two weeks later the ultrasound showed the blood had gone down some and baby was still alive! That was good news! I went in for the ultrasound the next month (Dec. 10th) and that showed that baby is growing where he/she should be so that is looking great. The blood is still there, but more dense and hasn't grown at all which is great news. I do have placenta previa, but that can change as the uterus grows. I am scheduled to see a high risk doctor next month for these issues and also since I am "AMA" (Advanced Maternal Age) so am high risk already. I have started regular OB care which feels better, but am still having a rollercoaster of emotions so would love if all of you would keep baby and I in your prayers! Currently I am almost 17 weeks and have been feeling little flutters! :)
With that all told I would like to say:
Merry Christmas to all of you!!


  1. oh Amanda ,I am sorry for the emotional roller coaster! Congratulations and I will certainly pray!

  2. continued prayers! Keep us posted :)

  3. miscarriages and possible miscarriages are SO hard! Praying all is well!